Putting Children First: A New Blueprint for Family Law Professionals and Separating Parents
The recent publication of the Family Solutions Group report “Putting Children First: The Evolving Role of the Family Law Professional” marks a significant moment in the continuing evolution of family justice in England and Wales.
Alongside the report, a powerful letter from the Children’s Commissioner for England to separating parents has been introduced, urging parents to reflect carefully on how their decisions and behaviour during separation may affect their children.
Together, these developments represent an important step toward reshaping how professionals and parents approach family separation — placing children firmly at the centre of decision-making.
Why this matters
Each year approximately 280,000 children experience the separation of their parents in the UK. The way that separation is managed can profoundly affect their wellbeing, mental health and future life chances.
Research consistently shows that it is not separation itself that harms children most — it is exposure to ongoing parental conflict.
For many families, disagreements about living arrangements, schooling or time with each parent can quickly escalate into legal disputes. In fact, more than 80,000 children are named in private law court applications each year where parents cannot resolve these issues themselves.
This is the context in which the Family Solutions Group’s work has been developed.
The Family Solutions Group’s vision
The Family Solutions Group (FSG) is a multidisciplinary group of professionals with extensive experience supporting separating families. It was established to explore how families can be supported before issues escalate into court proceedings, focusing particularly on the “pre-court” space where most families begin navigating separation.
The new report calls for a shift in mindset across the family justice system.
It emphasises that family law professionals should increasingly act not simply as legal advisers but as problem-solvers and guides, helping families navigate separation in ways that reduce conflict and prioritise children’s welfare.
Among the recommendations are:
- greater emphasis on understanding child welfare and child development
- enhanced training for family law professionals in managing parental conflict
- stronger recognition of the voice of the child in decision-making
- a move away from adversarial processes wherever it is safe to do so
- improved support services for separating families outside court
At its heart, the report recognises that separation is not only a legal event — it is a family transition, requiring emotional, practical and relational support.
The Children’s Commissioner’s letter to separating parents
Perhaps the most powerful element of this initiative is the “Dear Parents” letter from the Children’s Commissioner for England, Dame Rachel de Souza.
Family lawyers are being encouraged to share this letter with parents at the earliest stage of separation. The message is simple but profound.
Parents are reminded that:
- children often feel caught in the middle when parents appear to be “fighting for them”
- children can feel responsible for parental conflict
- listening to children’s views helps them feel heard, even when adults ultimately make the decisions
The letter encourages parents, where safe to do so, to explore non-court solutions, including mediation, parenting programmes and other collaborative approaches to resolving disputes.
The aim is not to prevent access to the court when it is necessary — particularly where safeguarding concerns arise — but to encourage parents to pause and reflect on the impact of their conflict on their children.
Reframing the role of family law professionals
This report reinforces a growing shift in the role of those working with separating families.
Traditionally, the legal process has often been adversarial, with professionals representing competing positions. However, as evidence about the impact of parental conflict on children has grown, so too has the recognition that professionals must play a different role.
Increasingly, family law practitioners, mediators, counsellors and financial advisers are working together within interdisciplinary frameworks, supporting parents to:
- reduce conflict
- improve communication
- develop sustainable co-parenting arrangements
- keep children out of the centre of adult disputes
This approach reflects a broader understanding that the best outcomes for children are achieved when parents can continue to work together, even if their relationship as partners has ended.
Keeping children at the forefront
At the core of this work is a simple but powerful principle:
Children should never become casualties of adult conflict.
When parents separate, children are navigating their own emotional journey. They may feel uncertainty, worry, loyalty conflicts and fear about what the future holds.
The responsibility of both parents — and the professionals supporting them — is to ensure that children feel:
- safe
- heard
- loved by both parents
- protected from conflict
By keeping children’s experiences at the forefront of decision-making, separating families can begin to reshape the narrative of separation — not as a battle to be won, but as a transition to be managed responsibly and respectfully.
A moment for reflection
The launch of the Family Solutions Group report and the Children’s Commissioner’s letter offers an opportunity for everyone involved in family justice — parents and professionals alike — to pause and reflect.
If separation is approached with respect, collaboration and a focus on children’s wellbeing, families are far more likely to move forward in a healthier way.
For parents facing separation, the message is clear:
Your children are not part of the dispute — they are the reason the dispute must be resolved well.
And for those of us working with separating families, the challenge is equally clear:
to continue developing a system that puts children first, reduces conflict, and supports families to find constructive paths forward.
